Wondering how you can make a great first impression — and be seen as competent, confident, and intelligent?
Sometimes, it’s easier to see what not to do.
Watch Michael Grinder as he shares the six wrong ways to make a first impression.
Six Wrong Ways to Make a Right First Impression
Hi, my name is Michael Grinder and I’m going to be with you in Florida at the National Speakers Association. There are many breakout sessions — mine happens to be called Six Wrong Ways to Make a First Right Impression.
Recommended Way
How do we come across to our audience so they see us as confident and competent and especially intelligent?
Here’s the secret:
Talk with your hands and when you come to a pause, don’t move your hands until you talk again.
Now, that’s the recommended way but we almost have to be aware of how we do it wrong, so we have that contrast in our mind, so we can do it the right way.
The Six Wrong Ways
The first of six ways to do it wrong is to go ahead and be what’s called an incessant talker.
1. Incessant Talker
An incessant talker is someone who almost just almost never breathes, when they finally do breathe, they actually almost gasp the air in and when they come all the way down get the diaphragm moving a little bit and they continue to go on because they’re afraid someone may ask them a question and they may lose all sense of continuity of what they want to say.
2. Hyper-Active
The second wrong way to do it is almost like the person only this time you’re a little bit of caffeine high, you know what I mean? Sometimes you can’t even find your words, it really really is a hyper kind of thing really really lots of energy lots of energy.
3. Medicated
The third way to do it wrong is exactly the opposite of the second, it’s called medicated.
And perhaps I tilt a little bit too much of it. Do you know what I mean by that?
4. Thigh Slapping/Fitness
The fourth way and fifth and six are very very active.
You’re going to use your hands just fine, the problem with the fourth one is every time you pause, you drop your hands all the way down to your thighs.
It’s almost like, “I don’t have time to go to the gym tonight. I’m going to get my workout while I’m presenting.”
5. Belly-Button-Insecurity/BBI
The fifth way is much more sophisticated, we don’t drop our hands all the way down to our thighs, but what we do is bring them back to our midsection. It’s almost like we have belly button insecurity.
“Is it still there?” So we keep checking in each time.
6. Milking
The sixth way is we don’t even bring our hands back. We keep our hands away from our torso. It looks like, as we pause, we got up early this morning to take care of the cows. This is called milking.
Six Wrong Ways to understand how to make the first right impression.
The mind learns through contrast by seeming confident, competent, and especially intelligent because we talk with our hands, we pause, then we talk again. We look intelligent.
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