It’s Krista Grinder-Dettloff here, and I’m joined by my dad, Michael Grinder! Over the years, I’ve had the privilege of learning from my father—whether it was through our shared experiences or by watching him revolutionize the way people communicate. Recently, a great question came my way: Could I interview my dad about how his work connects with others? The answer? Absolutely!

Where It All Began

Michael’s journey started in sunny Southern California, a hub for humanistic psychology. Influenced by greats like Abraham Maslow, Viktor Frankl, and Carl Rogers, he developed a passion for personal growth, which ultimately shaped his work in communication. His very first book, One Man’s Journey Towards Himself Through Others, was just the beginning.

Education, NLP & The Power of Observation

Fast forward to when I was in sixth grade—this is when my dad began presenting his first educational book, integrating Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) into teaching. Inspired by his brother, John Grinder (one of NLP’s co-founders), my dad explored how teachers could apply NLP techniques to improve classroom learning. His books and methods have since been used by educators worldwide!

Love & Logic, ENVoY & Classroom Management

One of the biggest milestones in my mind? His collaboration with Love & Logic, where he shared ENVoY, a book on the nonverbal side of classroom management. Jim Fay invited him to teach alongside their team, and the connection was a natural fit. From preserving relationships (ENVoY), to establishing relationships (A Cat in the Doghouse), to understanding group dynamics (The Healthy Classroom), his work has reshaped education at every level.

From Education to Leadership

But wait, there’s more! As his insights grew, so did his impact—his techniques extended beyond classrooms into leadership and business settings. Research by Robert Marzano highlighted relationships as the #1 factor in student success, and my dad took that to heart, applying those principles to leaders managing teams and organizations.

A Key Takeaway for YOU

Want a quick exercise to improve your communication? Try this:

• Recall a past event where emotions took over.
• Mentally step outside yourself and view the scene from a different perspective.
• Identify a direction (in front, behind, left, or right), establish distance, and observe from that point.
• Assign a pronoun to yourself (he/she/they) and watch the scene unfold from this detached viewpoint.

This method gives you fresh insight and more choices when similar situations arise in the future. Give it a try!

Go Apply These Tools Today!

You’ve just spent a few moments with us learning how to become a better communicator—now it’s time to take action! Use these insights today and see the impact in your interactions.

Until next time,

Michael Grinder & Krista Grinder-Dettloff